Hello folks! It’s sharing time. I’ve been debating opening up about this for a large period of my life. I’ve seen friends not be able to understand or accept it and I’ve felt further isolated and lost because of societal stigmas perpetuated by many of them and countless others. Though I’ve worked to assist others in their truth, I’ve only shared my truth with a select few. In June I began to slowly do so publicly and I intend to further share my story in an effort to further diminish social stigmas, assist others in this never-ending battle and in all honesty free myself of the “mental slavery” its caused me. With this written…I must share…my name is Juan Carlos Piñeiro Moyet and I suffer from depression.
A couple of doctors have told me that it’s “mild” depression. However, that just sounds like a kind of sauce to me. As if mild depression could be used on my lunch. So instead, I’ve decided to stand in the reality of my mental illness and accept that I suffer and have suffered for many years from an illness that is rapidly growing and affecting millions around the world. I wrote those last few words to make an important point. We’re not alone! Even when I wake up in the morning and it’s difficult to quiet the negative thoughts or even get out of bed for that matter…I know… for a fact, that I and most importantly WE…ARE NOT ALONE!
I don’t give up. When people tell me that something isn’t possible I don’t believe them because the negativity in my mind has already told me the same on countless occasions and I’ve proved it wrong again, and again and AGAIN. I keep moving. I get on my yoga mat to heal the mental anguish I feel even when my mind and body have nothing left to use. I keep speaking. I do so even when the darkness in my mind tells me that I’m a hypocrite for helping a young adult through his or her life journey while I still have difficulty getting out of the house on some days. I keep learning. I do so even when the dark shades point to an empty void. I learn as much as possible knowing that I’ve seen the fertile horizon, have been there and will be there again. I breathe! I inhale and exhale with the pride of a lion knowing that I’ve pulled myself from dark tunnels of thought on countless occasions and in having done so have been able to assist thousands of others through their own individual life journeys. I breathe!!! Because I refuse to give in to the dark thoughts and allow them to take away a partner, a son, a friend, a brother, an uncle, a mentor, a motivator, a leader, a teacher, a guide, a funny dude, an educator, a bad-ass (in a good way), or any of the other roles that I play in the lives of others.
I can’t give up. Because the climb though immensely challenging leads to incredible beauties that must be both seen and shared. Because if I do then I wouldn’t be me and like you, and like every other beautiful being on this planet am freakin AMAZING! Amazingness does not “go gently into that good night”. It “rages” because of the power that lies in knowing, accepting, honoring and strengthening in one’s truth.
Consider this my “Mental Illness Manifesto”. One that outlines my truth, what I do and intend to do about it. I suffer from depression. I work mercilessly to combat it and intend to continue sharing my battle in written and spoken form so that I and the many others that I come in contact with, can find a refuge in the solidarity that is our collective battle.
P.S. Run on sentences are bad-ass and neither depression nor its negativity can tell me otherwise!
P.S.S. MORE TO COME!
Juan-Carlos 